Massages and Facials in Suburbia...

First, I would like to make mention Mimi has not been in such a great mood lately, and thus not as amorous as normal and certainly not as adventurous as she might be.

It is unfortunate that your clamoring and calls for her to wash the car with me did not workout, but fear not readers, we might yet be able to goad her into such a situation soon, as soon as she can center herself.

In answering back to numerous comments she received from one of her posts, Mimi mentioned something about massage therapy. This is something she has recently started talking about with me. At any rate, I believe it was the Chuckster who asked her something regarding one of those full service type massage places. Well sorry, not gonna happen. But that did remind Mimi of a story she touched on and I think I will tell you all since it is actually quite humorous!

So here is the deal. We live in a rather quiet suburb of Atlanta, very far out and to the north. So I have this friend of mine who is an officer on the local police force. This is one of those towns where you have to drive slow or else they pull your for going a fraction of a mile over the limit and hit you with a full fine. Now I know or have grown to know that there is a darker element in our little town since my buddy joined the police force. Officer Bob has educated me about the drug arrests at a local hotel, and we had a drive by shooting, and there are car chases and robberies, etc… Basically our little town has a small criminal element, but nothing one really notices unless they know a cop.

At one time, when I was working a normal schedule and I was making some cash, and we were pulling out of our financial nose dive, I played around with the idea of getting Mimi an in-home massage. So I picked up this local rag we have in the ATL area and for many weeks looked to try and find my Mimi someone affordable, and in our area that might want to give Mimi a Massage. Ok, and yes… ulterior motives were involved. I should also mention I am always looking for a new place to send Mimi for massages and the such, hoping to find a nice little day spa locally that is reasonable in its cost (still haven’t found what I am looking for there). So at Any rate, I come across an ad for a spa in this rag (which is a great way to advertise inexpensively) and saw it was on a road just down the street from us.

Ok, so I am not naïve to say the least, although I have never partaken, I do know what goes on in massage joints; I lived in Korea, and other places overseas so although not experienced, I am versed in these establishments. With that said, I was quite confused that a place like that might open up in our town. So knowing our town and neighborhood, and certainly not believing it could ever be a Korean type massage parlor, I went to check it out. So I cruise over there and walk in, and Holy shit… WTF is this? I cannot believe in my little town, there is a real live Mama-san massage parlor. The window flies open, and Adjima (same as a Mama-san) says, “can I help you.”

So just to make sure I was where I thought I was, I said, I was looking for a place to bring my wife for a massage, I asked her what kind of facilities they had for my wife, and she asks me if my wife likes girls. Well now… I know we are all on the same page of music now, and I tell Adjima, its ok, and I will see her later, and I walked out. Now I am not entirely opposed to taking Mimi to one of those places, but I am certainly not going to do so in our little slice of suburbia. I could see my buddy coming and raiding this place while were there… Not a good picture, I can tell you. Because I knew it was only a matter of time before this place was raided. In downtown Atlanta, there’s no problem with these places. But in the burbs, I was really wondering WTF were these people thinking.

Ok, now I have this other friend of mine, her name is Dee. And Dee is a nice attractive woman, probably a MILF but she has a more athletic bod with not so many curves Nothing like my type of woman, but we are pretty good friends, and Mimi calls her one of my girlfriends. So Dee, who is naïve, and is literally a lifetime suburbanite, who main experience in a city is probably a concert or a nice elegant dinner out, has no clue about anything. I mean she is sweet and I really do like her and all but she seems to me a very much missionary type person, and Mimi agrees. So we are at a social gathering and I am talking to her and a couple of other wives, and some how something is said about something which triggered Dee. Suddenly Dee turns to me, puts her hand on my shoulder and says, “You will not believe what happened to me and B (her daughter).”

So she is telling me about it being B’s birthday and she was looking for a place they could go for a mother/daughter spa treatment. Well folks, you guessed it. My friend takes her daughter to this place, and they walk in. Dee tells me immediately she felt uncomfortable and was not sure about the place. So the Adjima opens the glass window and sees who it is, and my friend Dee tries to converse with her, and is asking about getting her daughter a facial! Well I just fucking started rolling with her telling me that. I mean, the irony of what she is asking and believe me, she has no idea what a facial is from a sexual standpoint. But I am imagining this woman, in her tennis skirt or something with her daughter asking for a facial from a massage parlor catering to men’s special massages… It was a vision of beauty and much internal laughter.

So the worst part of this whole episode was that I had to explain to her what was going on. She knew something was odd, especially after they refused to talk to her, but could not put her finger on where the problem was exactly. So I had to explain to her what that place was and that I visited it some weeks before. A good laugh was being had when another buddy of mine who has his office across the street form the strip mall this parlor was located and my police officer buddy both walk up on us. As it turns out, my buddy who is a lawyer was doing something in his office and one of his paralegals yells to him to come to the window (this happened only days before this conversation) and sure enough, our police department was closing the place down and raiding it. So our police officer buddy pipes up and starts telling us, “Oh yeah, they are closing that place down, there will be no way that place stays open.” So apparently they had a guy go inside, tape a conversation, and then the raid begun. They took a couple of Johns to jail, and everyone in the place. They let the owners bail out, open that night and they were raided again, so the night folks could get booked too, and yet a few more John’s got taken in.

I think the place stayed open about eight weeks in out quiet little burb. How in the world, these people thought they could open a massage parlor in Vanilla Southern Bible Belt Suburban America is so far beyond me as to not even comprehend their thinking. Never the less, my friend went to get a facial for her daughter and I was looking to get a special massage for my wife. That is just funny as shit.