Deciding To Revisit Fabio Fucker
I love my son to death. I have mentioned in past entries that he is my first greatest creation. I will never forget the moment he took my hand, as he was being washed off and warmed up, and squeezed it. I told him that everything was ok and squeezed his hand back and I tell you all, he stopped crying. As God is my witness, he honestly stopped crying as if he knew that everything really was going to be alright. My son, as all children (even as an adult, I am sure my parents feel this way about me) are a work in progress. He is eleven years old and as any child at eleven, has a long way to go. However, I have a pet peeve when it comes to my son, and it is something that has flat out upset me for many of his eleven years. My son cannot make a decision. Not that he can’t make ANY decisions, but when asked to make a decision to do something he has a tendency to tell you, “I don’t know,” or , “I am not sure,” or “what do you think,” etc…
I understand he is a child, and as a child he may not be equipped to make some decisions. I readily accept the fact when asked, if he thinks as woman/girl (someone on TV like Hillary Duff) is hot, I will get an answer of, “I do not know.” For an eleven year old not exactly into girls yet, or somewhat embarrassed about girls still, I understand perfectly his position or lack thereof. My problem comes in where we ask him if he wants to do “A” or “B” and he tells us “I don’t know,” or, “I am not sure.” An example is the other day we ask him if he wants to go out somewhere with us and he cannot make the decision of “yes” or “no.” and I get thoroughly frustrated. I mean all I want to know is if he wants to go with us, and I do not want a lot of gibberish about why he is not sure or whatever. Now, I am not stupid, he does not want to go because he is playing a game online. I quickly explain that I really do not care what his decision is, nor do I care about his justification either way. I was not going to get upset with any decision he was going to make I just wanted him to make a “yes” or “no” decision and that was it. I ended up getting very frustrated, told him if he could not make a decision, and knowing he wanted to stay home, to go get his shoes and socks because he was coming with us.
At this point he got upset with me and started going on about how he wasn’t sure what he wanted to do and blah, blah, blah. I told him no problem, that if he could not decide for himself, I was going to tell him what he was going to do. Still he was griping and I kept asking him what’s it going to be, and still no response. Finally he was pitching a fit while putting his shoes on and then I lost it, I yelled at him and told him that since he could not make a simple decision that he better hush up and deal with my decision that I made for him. Finally, after badgering and yelling he caved and told me that no, he did not want to go. And then he started telling me why. I told him I didn’t care why, but I thanked him for making his decision and dropped the subject and stopped yelling. He was very surprised I immediately, as if the storm had been turned off in mid stream, stopped being upset with him.
So yesterday morning I got home and had breakfast/dinner (or whatever meal it is cause I am so screwed up with my schedule by this time of the week mornings are night and nights are fucking mornings) with my son and Mimi and the daughter. I wanted to revisit the decision issue with my son again. You see, I think, being able to make a decision is an important thing. Once again, growing up in the military world and being in the Army made me a good decision maker. The military forces people to learn how to make decisions and that indecision, being a decision in and of itself, will get you and your people killed every time, thus, my frustration with people who cannot make decisions. So I start explaining to my son why it is crucial to be able to make decisions and I gave him a couple of scenario tests.
An example:
You are the captain of a ship, and your ship is heading straight for an iceberg. You have 10 seconds to make a decision on what to do before the ship passes the no turning back point and will hit the iceberg regardless of what is done.
Pause: now invariably most people like my son, would say stop the ship. But you see you cannot, because if you stop the ship or even reverse your propellers in full reverse the forward motion of the ship will still run you into the iceberg.
So now I tell him, you have two apparent choices, A) turn the boat to port (left), or B) turn to starboard (right).
So now he asks me what happens if I turn the ship one way or the other. I tell him it doesn’t matter but he has ten seconds to make the decision to save the people on the ship. I forget what he said, but that wasn’t the point. The point is, he made the third non-apparent decision… He made no decision at all, he was caught up in the situation that he did not make the decision. So when he told me what decision he made, I told him it was too late because he had taken more than ten seconds.
My son was not happy about the outcome to say the least. But I explained that in the context I laid out the problem, he needed to make a decision whether it was right or wrong, a decision was needed to be made to avert eminent and unavoidable peril.
I have given my son an assignment in life. I have explained that decision making is hard, but not making a decision is worse than any bad decision one can make. Indecision is what kills people and is what is paralyzing business and commerce today. People are scared to take responsibility and make decisions. Every day we make decisions that have a domino effect across your immediate life and believe it or not across the universe. This is the “Butterfly Effect,” which is the root of the Chaos Theory. Now look, I recognize it is hard to fathom how your decision to go one way or another to work on any given day can have any effect on another person across the world, but if you read and understand the basics of Chaos and the Butterfly Effect, then you can grasp the concept. My point is, that no matter what decision you make it will ultimately be a bad decision for someone, whether it is apparent to you or not. SO I have tasked my son to make decisions. Just make the decision without analyzing it to death. Normally the first decision you have in your head is the best (most times).
Many people get caught up in analyzing a problem, worrying about its effect on the decision maker, about the company and those who are affected by the decision etc… And what happens? Paralysis of a decision because no one wants to take responsibility to make the decision unless they get it passed off by someone else or unless they are sure it is the “right” decision or unless in many cases, they have someone to blame for the decision if the decision is immediately wrong and things go to shit. And that folks, is what I am going to bitch about.
So let’s talk about my manager whose name is now penned as FF, or more descriptively Fabio Fucker. About a month and a half or two ago, this chick who is now one of my peers was presented an opportunity (I use that term quite loosely) to come work on our team. I should also point out, back in February I told FF that I could not do this night shift stuff for a myriad of reason, and wanted to come to days per our agreement when I was drafteedfor this shit position. Well, back then he wasn’t sure what to do. He asked me to come up with a couple of different scenarios but he didn’t like either of them and so he told me he would think about it. He came up with some outrageously idiotic scenarios a few days later and asked me what I thought, and I told him the ideas were really not feasible to maintain team integrity. And based on those ideas, I would not move me either. So I stayed on nights because I made a decision for him since he didn’t like my scenarios. So now when I bring up the issue in February he reminds me that I said I wouldn’t make the decisions he proposed, thus I stayed on nights. What a spineless sack of shit.
So back to this new chick… It turns out that in March we are told we will get additional headcount and behind closed doors FF tells me I would get to come to days. Now I am not sure if I blogged about coming to days, I think not because I sure didn’t hold my breath. No sooner had he told me this, than I get a call from this chick who was my peer before I came to this team. She asks me what I think of the job. Knowing her job is going down a path she had no business being on, and knowing if she did not come over to our team, she would be up shit creek, I told her I thought it would be a great move. Now I never even considered the fact FF would fuck me like he ultimately did when talking to this chick, but I should have considered it.
Before I know it, this chick is on our team, and is working days. I get called in by FF and he explains that she is an employee and she wanted days. So he wasn’t in a position to make a decision. I called bullshit, and told him that based on our conversation that he told me I would get the spot, but se la vie, right? Once again, he let someone else guide and make his decision and pushed the blame somewhere else. This is a guy who will not make decisions for the team, he tells us to work it out and come back with how we want to do it, and when something goes awry he fingers the person who made the decision for him. I have seen it over and over again.
So what prompted this entire diatribe is a follow up to how I penned FF’s blog nickname and what a fucked up backstabbing dickhead he is and the simple fucked up nature of this entire organization.
You see this chick who usurped my day shift comes to me the other week and asks if I wanted to switch with her. Now, folks, I am nobody’s fool, so I said yeah of course, like it’s a no-brainer. She asks me if the night job is hard, and really its dealing with all the fuck-ups other people make so I tell her… Nope, its as simple as pie. I just want to get on days to have a normal fucking diurnal sleep pattern and would like to actually spend normal weekends and evenings with my family. She says cool, it’s a done deal. She gives me her reasons why she wants nights and mentions that now her husband is no longer working so the night shift is cool with her. Now I am pissed off about that last statement because FF lead me to believe this chick had some sort of serious issue with her home life that made it necessary to work days, and not only that… but initially the day shift was set up to be eight hours a day and run from either Sunday through Thursday or Tuesday through Saturday to span at least one weekend day. Funny thing is, her shift ended up being just what she wanted, nine to five, Monday through Friday. Its amazing how shit like that happens, huh?
So as it turns out, she wants nights now, I want days, we take it FF at the beginning of the week since FF has just returned from vacation. We propose, and he says he will think about it. I mean WTF, like this is a no brainer, everyone gets what they want and things are hunkey dorey (SP?), right? Nope not in FFs book, he wants to T-H-I-N-K about it, he is a moronic middle management non-decision making fuck. He is worried about what could go wrong.
On Wednesday, we have a staff meeting which provides him the perfect opportunity to blame his indecision on someone else or something else. We have obtained a new responsibility from another unit which has been kicking our butts from a man power perspective. So we discuss how this process needs to be done, and my suggestion is to put it into another group that is better suited for this task and is pretty much the same thing they already do as part of their job. But nope, FF thinks he should assign it to one of us and not only that, but that person should go to another team. And that person he tells me in his office later on, is the chick who wants to swap out with me.
Well it is ridiculous how much I have droned on, but I guess the point to this entire Michner-like novel I have written, is that the pain and fear of decision making needs to be learned at a young age because if not, you end up with weasely upper management types who put their decision making off on others. After an issue last night I was asked why such and such person made a certain decision during a crisis. I told FF, “the hell if I know… I was more concerned in fixing the problem than interrogating my people so someone could point a finger at him later on,” and I walked off. I guess this is why he would rather have me on the night shift because he doesn’t want me coming after him, like he knows I would, in front of directors and VPs. What a fucking pussy he is!
I understand he is a child, and as a child he may not be equipped to make some decisions. I readily accept the fact when asked, if he thinks as woman/girl (someone on TV like Hillary Duff) is hot, I will get an answer of, “I do not know.” For an eleven year old not exactly into girls yet, or somewhat embarrassed about girls still, I understand perfectly his position or lack thereof. My problem comes in where we ask him if he wants to do “A” or “B” and he tells us “I don’t know,” or, “I am not sure.” An example is the other day we ask him if he wants to go out somewhere with us and he cannot make the decision of “yes” or “no.” and I get thoroughly frustrated. I mean all I want to know is if he wants to go with us, and I do not want a lot of gibberish about why he is not sure or whatever. Now, I am not stupid, he does not want to go because he is playing a game online. I quickly explain that I really do not care what his decision is, nor do I care about his justification either way. I was not going to get upset with any decision he was going to make I just wanted him to make a “yes” or “no” decision and that was it. I ended up getting very frustrated, told him if he could not make a decision, and knowing he wanted to stay home, to go get his shoes and socks because he was coming with us.
At this point he got upset with me and started going on about how he wasn’t sure what he wanted to do and blah, blah, blah. I told him no problem, that if he could not decide for himself, I was going to tell him what he was going to do. Still he was griping and I kept asking him what’s it going to be, and still no response. Finally he was pitching a fit while putting his shoes on and then I lost it, I yelled at him and told him that since he could not make a simple decision that he better hush up and deal with my decision that I made for him. Finally, after badgering and yelling he caved and told me that no, he did not want to go. And then he started telling me why. I told him I didn’t care why, but I thanked him for making his decision and dropped the subject and stopped yelling. He was very surprised I immediately, as if the storm had been turned off in mid stream, stopped being upset with him.
So yesterday morning I got home and had breakfast/dinner (or whatever meal it is cause I am so screwed up with my schedule by this time of the week mornings are night and nights are fucking mornings) with my son and Mimi and the daughter. I wanted to revisit the decision issue with my son again. You see, I think, being able to make a decision is an important thing. Once again, growing up in the military world and being in the Army made me a good decision maker. The military forces people to learn how to make decisions and that indecision, being a decision in and of itself, will get you and your people killed every time, thus, my frustration with people who cannot make decisions. So I start explaining to my son why it is crucial to be able to make decisions and I gave him a couple of scenario tests.
An example:
You are the captain of a ship, and your ship is heading straight for an iceberg. You have 10 seconds to make a decision on what to do before the ship passes the no turning back point and will hit the iceberg regardless of what is done.
Pause: now invariably most people like my son, would say stop the ship. But you see you cannot, because if you stop the ship or even reverse your propellers in full reverse the forward motion of the ship will still run you into the iceberg.
So now I tell him, you have two apparent choices, A) turn the boat to port (left), or B) turn to starboard (right).
So now he asks me what happens if I turn the ship one way or the other. I tell him it doesn’t matter but he has ten seconds to make the decision to save the people on the ship. I forget what he said, but that wasn’t the point. The point is, he made the third non-apparent decision… He made no decision at all, he was caught up in the situation that he did not make the decision. So when he told me what decision he made, I told him it was too late because he had taken more than ten seconds.
My son was not happy about the outcome to say the least. But I explained that in the context I laid out the problem, he needed to make a decision whether it was right or wrong, a decision was needed to be made to avert eminent and unavoidable peril.
I have given my son an assignment in life. I have explained that decision making is hard, but not making a decision is worse than any bad decision one can make. Indecision is what kills people and is what is paralyzing business and commerce today. People are scared to take responsibility and make decisions. Every day we make decisions that have a domino effect across your immediate life and believe it or not across the universe. This is the “Butterfly Effect,” which is the root of the Chaos Theory. Now look, I recognize it is hard to fathom how your decision to go one way or another to work on any given day can have any effect on another person across the world, but if you read and understand the basics of Chaos and the Butterfly Effect, then you can grasp the concept. My point is, that no matter what decision you make it will ultimately be a bad decision for someone, whether it is apparent to you or not. SO I have tasked my son to make decisions. Just make the decision without analyzing it to death. Normally the first decision you have in your head is the best (most times).
Many people get caught up in analyzing a problem, worrying about its effect on the decision maker, about the company and those who are affected by the decision etc… And what happens? Paralysis of a decision because no one wants to take responsibility to make the decision unless they get it passed off by someone else or unless they are sure it is the “right” decision or unless in many cases, they have someone to blame for the decision if the decision is immediately wrong and things go to shit. And that folks, is what I am going to bitch about.
So let’s talk about my manager whose name is now penned as FF, or more descriptively Fabio Fucker. About a month and a half or two ago, this chick who is now one of my peers was presented an opportunity (I use that term quite loosely) to come work on our team. I should also point out, back in February I told FF that I could not do this night shift stuff for a myriad of reason, and wanted to come to days per our agreement when I was drafteedfor this shit position. Well, back then he wasn’t sure what to do. He asked me to come up with a couple of different scenarios but he didn’t like either of them and so he told me he would think about it. He came up with some outrageously idiotic scenarios a few days later and asked me what I thought, and I told him the ideas were really not feasible to maintain team integrity. And based on those ideas, I would not move me either. So I stayed on nights because I made a decision for him since he didn’t like my scenarios. So now when I bring up the issue in February he reminds me that I said I wouldn’t make the decisions he proposed, thus I stayed on nights. What a spineless sack of shit.
So back to this new chick… It turns out that in March we are told we will get additional headcount and behind closed doors FF tells me I would get to come to days. Now I am not sure if I blogged about coming to days, I think not because I sure didn’t hold my breath. No sooner had he told me this, than I get a call from this chick who was my peer before I came to this team. She asks me what I think of the job. Knowing her job is going down a path she had no business being on, and knowing if she did not come over to our team, she would be up shit creek, I told her I thought it would be a great move. Now I never even considered the fact FF would fuck me like he ultimately did when talking to this chick, but I should have considered it.
Before I know it, this chick is on our team, and is working days. I get called in by FF and he explains that she is an employee and she wanted days. So he wasn’t in a position to make a decision. I called bullshit, and told him that based on our conversation that he told me I would get the spot, but se la vie, right? Once again, he let someone else guide and make his decision and pushed the blame somewhere else. This is a guy who will not make decisions for the team, he tells us to work it out and come back with how we want to do it, and when something goes awry he fingers the person who made the decision for him. I have seen it over and over again.
So what prompted this entire diatribe is a follow up to how I penned FF’s blog nickname and what a fucked up backstabbing dickhead he is and the simple fucked up nature of this entire organization.
You see this chick who usurped my day shift comes to me the other week and asks if I wanted to switch with her. Now, folks, I am nobody’s fool, so I said yeah of course, like it’s a no-brainer. She asks me if the night job is hard, and really its dealing with all the fuck-ups other people make so I tell her… Nope, its as simple as pie. I just want to get on days to have a normal fucking diurnal sleep pattern and would like to actually spend normal weekends and evenings with my family. She says cool, it’s a done deal. She gives me her reasons why she wants nights and mentions that now her husband is no longer working so the night shift is cool with her. Now I am pissed off about that last statement because FF lead me to believe this chick had some sort of serious issue with her home life that made it necessary to work days, and not only that… but initially the day shift was set up to be eight hours a day and run from either Sunday through Thursday or Tuesday through Saturday to span at least one weekend day. Funny thing is, her shift ended up being just what she wanted, nine to five, Monday through Friday. Its amazing how shit like that happens, huh?
So as it turns out, she wants nights now, I want days, we take it FF at the beginning of the week since FF has just returned from vacation. We propose, and he says he will think about it. I mean WTF, like this is a no brainer, everyone gets what they want and things are hunkey dorey (SP?), right? Nope not in FFs book, he wants to T-H-I-N-K about it, he is a moronic middle management non-decision making fuck. He is worried about what could go wrong.
On Wednesday, we have a staff meeting which provides him the perfect opportunity to blame his indecision on someone else or something else. We have obtained a new responsibility from another unit which has been kicking our butts from a man power perspective. So we discuss how this process needs to be done, and my suggestion is to put it into another group that is better suited for this task and is pretty much the same thing they already do as part of their job. But nope, FF thinks he should assign it to one of us and not only that, but that person should go to another team. And that person he tells me in his office later on, is the chick who wants to swap out with me.
Well it is ridiculous how much I have droned on, but I guess the point to this entire Michner-like novel I have written, is that the pain and fear of decision making needs to be learned at a young age because if not, you end up with weasely upper management types who put their decision making off on others. After an issue last night I was asked why such and such person made a certain decision during a crisis. I told FF, “the hell if I know… I was more concerned in fixing the problem than interrogating my people so someone could point a finger at him later on,” and I walked off. I guess this is why he would rather have me on the night shift because he doesn’t want me coming after him, like he knows I would, in front of directors and VPs. What a fucking pussy he is!
posted by Just Call Me Jay at 9:27 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
<< Home